ScouseZaus's Mexican Cheesy Beans

This is my take on the classic Huevos Rancheros - with the bizarre addition of two sausage rolls I had knocking around in the fridge.

Take 2 small handfuls of cooked kidney beans, and the same of pinto beans. Heat gently in 150ml of Tomato Passata, with 1 dessertspoon of Sweet Chilli and a scant teaspoon of Peri Peri sauce.

I heated a frying pan and sprayed it with a thin layer of Chipotle Chilli oil, in which I gently fried a wholemeal tortilla.

Pile the beans on top of the tortilla, cover with grated cheese - I only had cheddar or mock-feta, so cheddar it was! - and flash under a hot grill or in the oven.

Top with a fried egg, cooked just the way you like.......And eat!

(The sausage rolls from the reduced counter are optional!)

Turkeys vote against Christmas

Is it just me, or does anyone else agree that the British Hospitality Association must be living in cloud-cuckoo-land to have undertaken a survey of its members as to whether they were in favour of slashing VAT from 20% to 5% - but just for hospitality businesses? Of course 98% said "yes"; and 95% said that they'd pass on all - well, perhaps a little - of the savings to their customers. (Caterer, 23rd April 2012). No sh*t, Sherlock!

When is a pub not a pub?

What is a pub? What is a gastropub?

In yesterday's Sunday Times (8th April 2012), AA Gill reviewed "Sheesh",  the restaurant at Ye Olde Kings Head in Chigwell, Essex, backed by the peer of the realm formerly known as S'r-Alan. "Sheesh occupies or perhaps squats in is a better term, a 16th-century inn". As to the food itself: "The menu is kebabs, shorter than you would get in most Mediterranean or Levantine dining rooms and without the complicated bits". Gill puts his sneer aside for a moment to confess that "there is a great deal to admire about it - it serves a local community with what they want", before turning his ire on the 'Olde England' lobby:  "We suffer too much from reconstructed, reverenced and preserved mimsy heritage".

So, Ye Olde Kings Head - whatever its other pretensions - does not proclaim itself to be a gastropub, a term which the editor of The Good Food Guide has argued is now devalued. Centre Parcs, however, have no such coyness. Foresters Inn, situated in Sherwood Forest (home of a certain legendary Robbin' Outlaw) serves pedestrian pub grub at hugely-inflated prices: Continental Breakfast at £4.95 and a 'Full English' at £7.95! Foresters Inn Gastropub Menu

Yet, despite this, the deputy editor of Publican's Morning Advertiser, Mike Berry, still praises the term as "it provides an instantly recognisable phrase to the public about what they should expect when stepping into such a pub". Morning Advertiser, 9th February 2012. Hmm, quite so!

The winner of The Budweiser Budvar Top 50 Gastropub Awards 2012 is a "pub" in Marlow, Buckinghamshire, called The Hand & Flowers. In October 2011 it was awarded its second Michelin star - the first "pub" to do so.

Excuse my sarcasm; I'm sorry, but this is not a pub - whatever it actually is! On the Hand and Flowers website the only reference to  "pub"  - tucked away in the picture gallery - is covered by three photographs showing rustic tables laid up with sprauncy glasses and cutlery. What stands out on every single page of the website is the button "Restaurant Reservations". ( The Hand and Flowers)

I like real pubs, with a proper mix of customers, like The Dog & Fox, Wimbledon Village, where I began my career 35 years ago: bank managers cheek-by-jowl with dodgy builders, the local baker, alcoholic journalists and bit-part TV actors…...

Oh, and did I mention Oliver Reed? And Jenny Agutter? And John Thaw & Dennis Waterman...

Not your average Good Friday Fish!

Poached smoked haddock with sweet potato & parsnip mash,

cauliflower in a creamy spring onion & cracked pepper sauce

I don't actually poach my fish - I cook it in a pyrex casserole dish in the microwave for about 4 minutes, and then slather with soft butter.

For the mash:
200g peeled and diced sweet potato, 100g peeled and diced parsnip.  Cook in lightly-salted and sugared water - give parsnip five minutes longer than the potato

Drain, keeping the water, and mash. Check the seasoning - I added a little butter to mine. The cooking liquor is great as a soup base.

For the veg:
3 spring onions, finely chopped - soften in a little butter, make a roux with 1tsp flour and whisk in a cup of milk; add a scant half-tsp cracked black pepper, a scant level tsp of English mustard powder, a little salt and a pinch of sugar. Check consistency and add more milk or boil vigorously to your liking.

Steam/microwave 4 florets of cauli and toss well in the sauce before serving.

Posh Scouse

Made with the traditional Scouse ingredients: mutton or lamb (in this case), onions, carrots  and swede, in a light broth - this also has barley (more Scotch Broth than Scouse!) and the posh extras of Sweet Potatoes and Parsnip.

 And it was delicious on yesterday's throwback-to-winter-day!